UPDATE: Robert did it! He walked right up to the performance area and delivered the poem he wrote about his PlayMobil pyramid with all the confidence of a 5 year old SuperBoy. We were very proud of him. He really liked his collar.
  We were just as proud when Laurel performed her recital dance without a  flicker of stage fright or a single misstep.
 Then she showed her quilt. As people oohed and ahhed, an adorable hambone seven year old boy stood up and said, “It’s so beautiful it makes me faint!”  With that he clutched his chest and collapsed to the floor.  Just like Fred Sanborn! This talent show was more fun than a Disney movie.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   Â
Costumes. That’s what I’m talkin’ about—and it’s not even Halloween. I got the call this evening that our 5 year old grandson, Robert, has made a last minute decision to participate in a talent show tomorrow.
Wearing this gaudy neck accessory, he will read a poem he has written about pyramids or mummies or Egyptians.  Whatever. For this, the first public reading of his literary work, I volunteered to make our little Boy King a “real” Egyptian collar to replace the paper one he had created earlier.
Even for a quick and easy project, this took longer than I expected. Throughout the process of selecting scraps, evaluating trims, digging through buttons and finally sewing, I reminisced about all the costumes I have sewn through the years. That’s a lot of memories, all tinged with –or should I say cringed with–uneasiness. It just seemed shamefully inappropriate to be tracing off Sarah Howard Stone’s spoke collar for a pharaoh frou-frou.
I’m always uncomfortable mediating the conflict between my usual high standards and the recognition that IT’S A COSTUME FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!%$!!!  There are no more than 24 hours in any single day and we each have to choose how they will be spent. So do I stitch an heirloom quality black metallic and satin Tut friendly mantle or “git’er done,” saving time for sewing more to my liking? The obvious imperfections of this costume piece illustrate my answer.
Surely, most of you have had to make the same choice. You have probably made costumes for dance, Halloween, Christmas pageants, school plays and other occasions. Did you go for the gold or just bite your lip and meet functional requirements?
I thought tonight about one of the most unusual costumes I have ever made. Linda, a nurse,  wanted to go to a Halloween party dressed as a cataract with her husband,  a very prominent opthamologist. He would suit up as a laser beam.  Only friendship could move me to tackle this project.
A hula hoop was covered with shiny fabric, selected by Linda because it was precisely the color of a “ripe” cataract. It was lightly stuffed to represent the curvature of the pupil. On the fabric I embroidered bits of corny text in small letters, simulating laser cuts. Phrases like “Can’t see? Call me!” followed by the name of the surgery center or “Need a fix for your vision? Al’s your physician!’ Linda wore black pants and shirt with her head stuck through a hole at the top of the hoop. Linda and Al were the hit of the party, though she said she had a hard time eating and dancing with that cataract hanging around her neck.
I didn’t spent a lot of time anguishing over the quality of that costume. It was no thing of beauty, but then, what cataract is? The things we do for friendship….
It’s a little like the things we do for grandchildren, like making size 5 Egyptian collars.  At the talent show, Laurel will perform her upcoming recital dance and wear the glitzy costume for that event.   So Robert needs something more substantial and showy than a paper collar over his pillowcase tunic.
It will be worth while if he doesn’t get stage fright. Film at 11.
What is the oddest costume you have made? What was your favorite?